These are some jokes that i came across and personally find pretty funny. In movies and tv shows, slapstick and gross humour aren’t as appealing to me as witty, quirky, sarcastic remarks (some of my all time favourites are Chandler – Friends, Greg House – House, Alan – Boston Legal, cast of Whose Line is it Anyway?) However, on the printed side of things, I’m able to tahan (and appreciate) quite abit of lameness in jokes:
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A snail learns to be a racing driver, At his first race he
is told to put a mark on the car to identify it in the race so he draws an S on the doors.
He gets off to a bad start but soon starts making his way through the field, As he takes first place the commentator excitedly shouts “Look at the S car go!”
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A penguin was driving his car down the road when he felt that the transmission was starting to slip.
Lucky for him, there was a transmission repair shop on the side of the road, so he coasted right up to the service bay and talked to the mechanic about the problem.
The mechanic said he was a little busy but could check it out in a half hour. The penguin said fine, and waddled off to kill some time on the street. A block up the road, he saw a 31 flavors Baskin Robbins store, he went in to get cooled off.
Hey, he’s a penguin.
After a little while, he went back to the repair shop, and saw that his car was up on the rack. The mechanic walked out to greet him, and said “Looks like you blew a seal”.
The penguin wiped off his mouth and said: “Nope, it’s just vanilla ice cream”
—
An Italian, a Scotsman, and a Chinese fellow are hired at a construction site. The foreman points to a huge pile of sand and says to the Italian guy, “You’re in charge of sweeping.” To the Scotsman, he says, “You’re in charge of shoveling.” And to the Chinese guy, “You’re in charge of supplies.”
A few hours later the foreman returns and finds the pile of sand untouched. “Why didn’t you sweep any of it?”
The Italian replies in a heavy accent, “I no gotta broom. You tella the Chinesea guy he inna charge of a supplies, but hea disappeara, and I coulda no finda him!”
Then the foreman turns to the Scotsman and asks, “Didn’t I tell you to shovel that sand?”
The Scotsman replies in his heavy brogue, “Aye, ye did, laddie, but I couldna get meself a shovel. Ye left the Chinee in charge of supplies, but I couldna find him!”
The foreman is really angry and goes looking for the Chinese guy.
Just then, the Chinese guy springs out from behind the pile of sand and yells, “SUPLISE!”
